I cockslap morals
Herpes is a lot like Arnold Schwartzenneger. Because it always comes back. Also, because it is usually in some way in control of California.
I woke up and there was 3 different size condom wrappers on the floor. What is this goldie locks and the 3 condoms???
I took her to see 2012 then broke up with her, the movie was a metaphor.
pretty sure i saw you masturbating on chatroulette a minute ago. yes, i can recognize your cock
I THOUGHT I SAW YOU
I have a page in my 2010 scrapbook dedicated to pictures of his cock.
Are you being sarcastic? I can't tell this time because you're in the hospital.
It would be one hovered percent delicioui
What should we drink tonight, I'm in the mood to be judged
I almost bumped into a man wrapped only in a blanket at 10 am
When I die I just want my headstone to my name, date of birth-death, and TEQUILA!!
I got back and Katie was asleep holding a burrito. I woke her up and she ate it and passed back out.
Running my fingers through my hair is like that scene from Patch Adams where the girl goes swimming in a pool of spaghetti. I love molly.
I mean, I'm shallow, narcissistic, and selfish, but I'm an amazing friend sometimes
Dude, she stopped mid blow job to ask the cat's name. ADHD might be a deal breaker after all.
Randomize