Lol speaking of weird...he just sent me a naked pic of himself that said "meow" at the bottom.
its whatevr the fuvk you could ever want is wht it is. i dont wanna read. literacy? overated in my opinion. overated.
you went around grabbing cigarettes out of peoples mouths and claiming you were curing cancer.
im vomiting on the 4th floor cause no one knows me there
chinese tourists just took a picture of me....im pretty sure i heard the bus drive say something about shame.
Out of all the things I've put my penis in, this seems the most unfortunate.
I puked all over his apartment, then slept with the skinniest girl here. Which isn't saying much in Ohio.
Tell him I thought his Superman stand on your bed and cum all over your back was quite funny
THERE IS NOT ENOUGH CAPSLOCK IN THE HISTORY OF THE WORLD TO EXPRESS MY CURRENT STATE OF WHAT THE FUCK JUST HAPPENED
I just climbed out the passenger side of my car because there was a spider on mine. I'm doing adulthood right
I think there is a legit party going on the place we thought was AA
Got a snapchat from Megan last night showing you sobbing about a burrito on the floor with Dan in the background trying not to laugh his ass off
His family, without saying anything, started a game of quarters the moment the drinks arrived. I love them. If only I didn't hate him so much.
sorry i got drunk at sunday brunch and force fed carrot sticks to your cat
She did what?
Who. The correct term is she did who.
Did you see him? The correct term is definitely what.
Randomize
