Yeah, i think she was German or something.
No dude, she's just got a speech impediment.
no. i just ate a whole thing of hot dogs. me and regret are sleepng alone tonigh.
Brutal- a couple weeks back I had a 28 hr blackout and four day hangover. S'why I decided to haul it in
all she had left on were here heels. phone five
Went to my car this morning. Found a waffle from Waffle House in the front seat. No idea how it got there. So hung over I ate it.
Please make the clown in the corner stop judging me. I mean he's the one with paint on his face. I don't need him judge judying me.
For the first time ever I'll be using my lunch break to pass out cold on my desk. We've gotta stop having these late night drinking things on Sundays
She was bending and I said "finally, about time". Wrong, she was tying her shoe. No blowjobs for me.
She called to say her plane was running late and i had 30minutes to get to the airport for bathroom sex
He said he doesnt believe in the female orgasm,so no I did not have sex with him.
Drink drank drunk tankkkkn, LETS GO
They are like untrained puppies reaking havoc on a newly furnished house. Out of control.
You just compared our vaginas to a newly furnished house...I can dig it.
He referred to our sex as "an Olympic event." My tits are bruised.
We need to get walkie talkies for when we're drunk so if we are at different parties or lost we can talk
you said you didn't feel like drinking anymore so you mixed vodka with your applesauce and ate it
Randomize
