U know its gonna be a great day when the guy at the liquor store waves at u cause u walked by
Busta Rhymes just yelled at me! He cut a song off and I was clapping and he looked right at me and said "don't fucking clap." I was that white guy.
its like playing clue every morning after we party. she did him in the kitchen with..oh god.
I found a knife in my bed when I got back this morning. I think one of my roommates has it in for me
Pregnancy confirmed. Complete emotional instability achieved. I just cried through 95% of Avatar.
I like how the only thing you spelled correctly is "i'm tequila"
I love when I'm alone in the house. It's like pants were never invented.
If she doesnt understand your inherent need to teabag an emo chick, do you really want to be with her?
Ladystoner tip: if eyes are bloodshot, lime green eyeliner makes them appear less red. its basic artt.
He's coming back with me for the week. It took me saying "I don't wanna drive myself home... I'm better as a passenger giving road head" for him to jump at it. Rack another one up for my magical openings.
Is it too early to say this year has been a blur?
fuck your need to drink for whitney a thousand times last night.
By the way I got my period today. No NHL babies for me.
His front door was open but I INSISTED on army crawling FOOT FIRST under the garage door. Then I peed the bed.
Soo I'm in the trunk of a car drunk about to jump on trampolines. My life rocks!
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