for on dont try to tell me you love me after three weeks of talking, for two if you are going to do that stay away from the song lyrics to a very good country song that you happened to ruin by using it, and for three erase my number im fuckin your sister now
I told him next time he kisses her to remember where that mouth has been...
How'd that go?
Hes on his way with a baseball bat...
he looks like a really good dad on facebook
Canada just beat USA, the sad part they still need us to make money so who really won
She's more of a "I'm gonna get herpes no matter how great her face looks like" pretty
I am assuming I was his dirty Mardi Gras mistake and I can live with that
the lady at the gas station just thanked me for wearing clothes this time... i am so confused
I had her number in my wallet, I was sitting on a winning ticket for the blowjob lottery and didn't know
I woke up at 4 am to my roomate peeing all over my clean laundry. He thought he was in the bathroom and yelled at me for being in the bathroom with him while he was peeing.
Dude, this is like the 4th time today I've had to use cruise control for a 25mph zone. This hangover is never fucking gonna end.
There is a hatefuck that has the destruction level of an atom bomb raging through my viens just aching to vaporize her.
Being drunk isn't an excuse for eating all of the bacon asshole
As he put it in he shouted "geronimo!"
Wow... So was the sex good?
Yeah but it doesn't matter. My vagina is not a pool.
there are LEGIT cum stains on my ceilling. ON THE CEILLING!! you tell me how the relationship was.
Is it good porn? Or is it more of that fucked up Cabbage Patch Doll porn you made us watch
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