The night ended with a lot of tears and everyone singing along to Willenium
Dude I thought this was going to suck, but moving back in with my dad is like being at a frat party every night only everyone is 40 years old.
that's like riding a pigeon when you could fuck a bald eagle
You kept spitting the skittles out cause you said they tasted like "balls of sandpaper"
Also managed to rip my pants and set myself on fire. And oddly enough I'm still not ready to ask for 2010 back.
i should do something illegal before my birthday. as of thursday im old enough to go to jail.
I saw him walking to campus with his beer in his hand in the same sweats he wore walking to campus with a beer in his hand yesterday.
You insisted we help some homeless guy put up posters for his missing pet alligator so we left you there because they were really just Chinese takeout menus.
Itll be like a collage of penis. And not that abstract, one penis in a big painting contemporary shit. Collage....
Who takes their shirt off at the bar?! Classy broad
I do. In all fairness there was someone else's blood on it.
Weekend plan is a big bag of dope, delivery food, Bollywood marathon and masterbating my dick raw.
So good news, aparently I blacked out and tried to go in the back of the mcdonalds to thank the people for makin my fries
Yeah we do. It needs to be like a good penis- long, substancial, and able to make people cry.
Like the fear of satan was put into my heart when I saw him put that sandwich on the WOODEN BENCH
I kept falling all over the place and yelled at the bouncer you can't kick me out I'm from Texas.
Randomize
