Currently in a meeting. i am playing the not throw up game. god i hope i dont lose.
i was so blacked out at my family party.. my mom gave markers to all my little cousins. i was tagged by 5 year olds.
Dude, the cops never think it's as funny as you do.
I enjoyed our heart to heart in the trunk on the way to the stripclub
Who ever is in the stall next to me is crying and it sounds like they're doing massive amounts of blow too. Finals for your ass huh.
If a baby can come out of it, so can four raquetballs.
first time i ever mailed panties back to a fuck buddy. what better of a way to say its over
This is a whole new generation of premature ejaculators
There was a slutty maid costume on the floor when I woke up, but the house was trashed. Either she's been fired or got promoted, I'm not sure which.
I just googled: how soon can I pee on a stick. What is my life coming to.
he just fluffed my hair and told me I had to dance with him because we were both gingers.
Fly, little bird! Repopulate the ginger race!
The last thing I remember is talking to the firefighter next to me and he was giving me fruit.
he fucked me while wearing his "Reagan Bush '84" tank and my inner democrat has never been more disappointed
Walking into her house she felt something in her bra.... It was a used condom. Sadly enough this is not the first or last time it will happen. It's time for an intervention.
They were out of watermelon smirnoff, so we got you a fifth of 5 o'clock and an actual watermelon.
Randomize
