there's a sledge hammer in the bottom of the swimming pool... so whatever happened last night was probably awesome
having my hair in braids makes puking so easy. i am being an indian every halloween
One of my other friends found me and the dog in the back seat of this one guy's car....I don't even know
The bloodstain in the garden looks like a sad face. Like I don't already know this is bad...
Can we talk about the fact that I plucked weed off your ass this morning like it's a normal thing to do?
Also I just learned you, Samantha, and I three-way made out at my Halloween party. News to me.
I finally fell asleep and like an hour later he wakes me up and says "I've always to be woken up w a blowjob." Um, that's not how it works asshole.
I woke up half naked on the floor next to his bed, and his cat was staring at me like it had seen everything that i myself don't remember..
The fact that it neither of us came up with the reason of "it's morally and ethically wrong" speaks volumes about this relationship
I rubbed his back while he puked for an hour and then ended up getting laid when I tried to put him to bed, best puke and rally I've ever seen.
you kept saying how you wanted to mainline bacardi right into your bloodstream. medical school is doing wonderful things to your brain
It's like "hey I give your roommate blowjobs twice a week, want to connect on LinkedIn?"
He said he didn't want to go down on me so I told him we were going to have an oral stalemate.
soo... how was my night?
dude. that's the chick that BIT MY DICK. it doesn't matter how hot you think she is, trust me man.
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