we got sick of 7 11 doubles so we made up a game where you just drink when anyone rolls a 5
thats barely a game just flip a coin
should we drink on heads or tails?
Drunk fuck. Had to tell him that the 5 second rule does not apply when your in the bathroom at the hockey game.
tiger just fucked it up for all of us...she grabbed my phone this morning and started asking questions.
I feel like I could be a daytime drinking legend, like they could put that shit on my tombstone and right now your preventing me from reaching my full potential
I have now slept with people from more countries than Ive actually visited. Can we make this a game somehow? Like foreign fuck buddy bingo?
Come on, without my personality, I'm a pretty good one night stand.
Two big black bouncers picked you up and escorted you to the elevator.
I didn't even do anything wrong. For all they knew I could have been on the US Olympic Gymnastic team. Would they kick Gabby Douglas out of a bar? I don't think so.
She said she is going to be sex-slave version of Princess Leia for halloween. You think there is any way I could pull off an attractive Jabba suit?
This is my college life. Rolling at 4PM on a Wednesday to skrillex in the parking lot of a mexican restaurant.
fuck emotions I should've gotten more cats
I woke up with a black eye and a buttplug...not sure I really want to know what happened.
Peeing in taco bell cups is part of the fun of going to taco bell
I just gave them my two week notice. Now is the perfect time to fuck my boss's son
I'm sorry i showed you my boobs.. I probably shouldn't have done that.
Punched myself in the face trying to open a bottle of Vicodin one handed. Night is going well.
Randomize
