I'm like a warm blanket that has sex with you
He told me I took off my shirt, asked for the latino thunder and jumped on him. I want to question this but it sounds too much like me.
I'm drinking beergaritas with a dog who is high and a baby
your completely serious
Do not buy whiskey under any circumstances. There should be a UN sanctioned buffer zone between me and Seagrams.
I just found a 2 minute video on my phone of you throwing up in a fake plant.
So I bought some random chick a shot she puked in her hands then I watched her make out with my roommate
I never thought that it would get to the point where I would have to specify that by "hang out" I meant "fuck like rabbits." Growing up shouldn't be this way.
I just used FaceTime as a look out while I got a blowjob in the library
Then, she put flavored warming oil on my dick and was amazed when something she bought FROM SPENCER'S almost burned my dick off.
You'll be happy to know that the bruise is gone from my cock
HOW THE FUCK IS IT POSSIBLE THAT THE JUNIOR HIGH STUDENT IS BETTER AT BEING AN ADULT THAN I AM!?!?
You do realize he's just an extension of his penis, right?
This can only be settled by a dance off.
Quit giving me a hard time, whens the last time you got head every night? Cougars are where its at they dont play games
Totally unrelated, but by the way I DO have one ball bigger than the other.
Randomize
