I'm exhausted and I have velveeta stuck in my teeth
Did you eat out Derrek's girlfriend again?
my brother wants to know why there are wet balloons in his bed and i think you forgot to throw the condoms away but im too hungover to check if thats what hes talking about
So after the reception we snuck back into the church for drunken hook up. we passed out there and woke up in time for 6am mass still dressed from the wedding. spiritually trashy or classy?
He looked me straight in the eye when he was fingering me last night...it was very serial killer.
triple team girl just facebook chatted me. do i tell her i had a nice time?
I think their strategy was based on people bein at a beach, seein a rainbow, and havin an orgasm at the same time.
Sprained my ankle at sky zone REST ICE COMPRESSION ELEVATION AND SHOTS it'll all feel better soon
Oh you don't have to buy a shower curtain, I stole the one from her bathroom. It has dolphins on it.
Hospital. He tried giving some kid a stone cold stunner during a real fight.
Quote of the night award goes to my father "I like wearing my swim trunks around the house because they are cooler and more blousy for my balls". Yay dad
Im rolling face in a pizzeria. I want to be with people who love me.
I want to get back to junior year skinny- without all the drugs.
The only thing I remember from last night is being naked in his bed if that's not summer drinking at it's finest then I don't wanna live anymore
But in today's society it's frowned upon not to wear pants in public.
My ladyscape is the envy of many and the shangrila of few. I will display it proudly.
HE MIGHT HAVE YOUR BUTTHOLE, BUT HE CANT HAVE YOUR HEART. THATS MINE.
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