at a party and just made O-H-I-O out of dicks and vajayjays...i hope someone took a pic i was too busy (; GO BUCKS!!!
I cant help but queef when the male extremity enters
What is a male extremity?
i didnt realize it was that long since you've had sex
As the guy I'm having sex with on the side I shouldn't ask you how to dump my boyfriend. But you are the most emotionally detached person I know.
is it possible that there's a used condom holding pennies in my bra? I'm so confused on what happened last night...
So idk if it's because I'm working out again or the coke, but I hit my target weight today. Whaaaat uuuup. Come and get me thanksgiving.
Drinking, I should not. Got here I don't know. Still drunk, I am. At courtneys.
Should I feel guilty that my husband is cheating on his girlfriend with me? I mean, we're not divorced yet so I still have dibs, right?
Discovery: bouncers seem to get really upset about fire
I tried to twerk on a barn in 3 inch heels at a party last night and nose dived into mud. These were all new friends. I'm probably not allowed back. Cool.
He's a real gentleman. At least he tried to flush my closet's handle after he pissed in it.
He wouldn't shut up so I started sending him pictures of animal dicks
I don't know what you're doing this morning, but obtaining Plan B is my number-one priority.
Damn victory sex feels great
I will be wearing a suit out more cuz it has been decided i rage harder with a power tie
So I figured out why that guy from Tinder stopped messaging me back. He got married.
Randomize
