this girl is running around outside screaming, it's creaming on me! it's creaming on me. I totally have to find my video camera
is it really weird I just got "suckable tits" in my honesty box and I'm flattered??
There are only two things that should be in vaginas... penises and vegetables
just stared at ed norton's ass for 26 miles. if there was ever an incentive to run a marathon, that was it. my life is perfect.
so the time management class we had to take for work seems to be working. I just beat off instead of waiting for gf to get home bc it fit my schedule better.
yes he's amazing in bed. he made me like, black out. everything went black it was weird. so yes, i'd fuck him again. plus, he has every season of buffy on dvd
that's not even the weird part though. he already knew where the bathroom was, he might have been here before..
i feel like the 7 eleven by your house knows our deepest, darkest secrets
it's pretty awkward texting you how much I want to suck your cock when I have my mom on speakerphone.
On my way
I just realized I haven't had a date or a potential possibility of a date in about a year. Then I realized I wanted to actually go on a date. But I'm sitting here getting high instead of being at a party. Life.
Gay?
German.
Pity.
Yeah last night got weird fast. No lie, a kid pulled a butt-plug with a tail out of his ass.
Dilemma. I'm out of wine and I can't put on clothes to go to the liquor store bc I just got spray tanned. If this isnt white girl problems I don't know what is.
Doing shots with my high school valedictorian. Bucket list
He couldn’t find my clit with a map. Literally. I drew him a map.
Randomize
