I just had sex with a black guy. He told me I had a big dick. I think that's God's way of saying it's okay to be gay.
At what point last night did I start ordering doubles?
Right after we had the just friends talk..
His whole family saw that I had cum in my hair once they turned on the blacklight at the bowling alley. You should have seen his mother's face.
The sign say "Kereoke" strip bar. 5 more beers and ill be ready to rumble.
My eyes feel like they're throwing up and I am the only human on campus
Nope. Too hot. We just sat in my tub with cold water spraying on us drinking coronas. This summer heat is killing my libido slowly
I've blown him while he hit my bong, I've blown him while he played video games and now I'm looking for a new challenge. Don't even try suggesting a blumpkin.
I don't give a shit if she's homeless, if you're gunna live outside el pollo loco and act like a bitch I'm squirting you with my water bottle
those kids just got delivered to the party by the pizza guy
Just got road head. In broad daylight. On the interstate. During rush hour. Pushing the envelope one public bj at a time.
Your next boyfriend should be from MENSA...you're so smart, it's intimidating as fuck. My penis retracted in fear.
Coming straight to your house after the flight. If not in Federal Prison for disobeying peanut laws.
He licked the buffalo sauce off my fingers and then we had the best sex of my life.
My boobs smell like weed again. This happens way too often.
Smoking weed with a blind guy, don't worry he's chill.
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