sunday morning discovery: something purple, smelly, and sticky my hair. any suggestions?
For some reason I have a hard time believing getting drunk and recreating a movie about singing transvestites is ever very far from a situation you're in.
So not only did team sweden fail to particpate in any drinking game but i also found puke in my viking helmet this morning.
I got Green Bay stickers to put on my nipples. This way when I flash it will look like I did it out of spirit as opposed to drunkenness
He started to lose his balance halfway through his "commencement speech" at the top of the staircase. The rest is bloody, profanity-laiden history.
Anything you tell me within three minutes of an orgasm isn't even being recorded in my head.
Besides the kids on acid... I was the highest kid there
Turning 21 will be slightly bittersweet. Never again will I be able to get underage drunk at Disney World, now I'll only be able to get legal drunk and that just sets a whole different and sad tone for my life.
Oh my god I haven't had mozzarella sticks since I banged that Applebee's waiter
do you remember your solution to not spill your drinks last night? .. Shots, that way you wouldnt have time to spill them. i love your drunken logic haha
Christ I forgot how flexible you need to be for a decent sext pic. Jesus.
He told me I was a good dog mom. I've never been so turned on in my life
Nothing like a dick pic from your fave ex to make you audibly exhale sadly.
She sent me a thank you card for not fucking her boyfriend...
so we have roughly decided that hes the dude all the chicks will bang in college, just so he will do their term papers
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