Yup u can hook up with me now and not goto jail
I had just got her shirt off when I realized that I was about to fuck Chewbacca from Star Wars. The way she moaned confirmed that I was.
Waking and baking in my bathtub. In a giant sweater. And no pants. This is going to be the best 420 ever.
The nursing school interview showed me a picture of my passed out during your party. They asked if this was a frquent thing. I told them you drugged me.
Alright, deal. Settling two drug deals before noon is what I call a productive day. I'm not even gonna go to math, I've practiced enough numbers for the day.
Yea I saw a friend of yours carrying your limp body somewhere
I'm having a really difficult time dealing with the fact that my dog now shares a name with Snooki's crotch-spawn.
The bouncer was just about to kick Sarah out for getting with this guy 'too physically'. I told him that was 'her style' and he let them stay. Banter.
The name of tonight's festivities is hereby decreed to be the "Honey Boo Boo Hootenanny".
Once I hang curtains in my truck bed that'll be feasible
You don't have issues. You're a consenting adult having sex at work. Go you.
I am eating a king sized snickers in the strip club. Good morning.
Of all the kinds of relationships I've had in my life, I'd have to say, lab-partner-with-benefits takes the fuckin cake
It's sunday night and I just went to the store to buy cookie dough and condoms, I'm so proud of myself.
Our baby is creepy.
That's how we know it's ours. haha
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