well if you came here i would keep you awake :*
did you just kiss me??? ... dude, im not gay
dude. i was so high. i watched shrek in russian.
She ordered a salad and a budweiser. I love her.
And I know a few people wouldnt want to even be around high people. Which is sad. But jet packs are cool.
It doesn't matter if I tell the story beginning to end or end to beginning, the story still starts with a random girl blowing me in the bathroom.
I think it's time we have the "weird fetish" talk.
But i don't feel like talking to him right now. I woke up an hour ago to a picture of his penis and I AM NOT A MORNING PERSON.
Last time I stayed at my moms my fucking car got set on fire sooo maybe I should think this through.
I also tried to solve my dog's itching problem with crystal healing. I'm so high, dude.
I just rubbed amethyst all over him and kept saying 'no bites.'
he was spending his time trying to use emojis to court a 19 year old, I can’t really take that seriously no matter how hot a dude is
Now just crop his dad out and add it to the spank bank.
I’m literally watching say yes to the dress, eating fancy cheeses with crackers, and I have orange dark chocolates. All of which is being washed down with merlot. And I’m 100% sure a porno is gonna go down next door tonight. They don’t have a car and arrived via taxi. Happy holidays from motel 6 Pendleton Oregon!
I'm really stressed out right now.
I think you're confusing "stressed" and "sober".
There's a lady rapping at me about making healthy food choices. She lives in a refrigerator. This is not okay with me
Fuck him. He can bang that skeezer all he wants. Fuck her lawyerness I’m a YouTube star
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