Saved 180 Bucks tonight. Pulled my own tooth. More money to party with.
We all need desperate help. Maybe we should just become a group of people who walk around town and shit in peoples air vents
I'm down.
She was so happy she found her sunglasses, that she blew me. Im now randomly hiding things of hers in hopes she'll find them and I'll get a repeat performance.
Just passed on a threesome. I'm too old for that kind of morning after.
the lady at the gas station just thanked me for wearing clothes this time... i am so confused
HURRY. I NEED DRUNK. MORE DRUNK.
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
I just got breakfast in bed and he went down on me. And you though he was a bad idea. Shame
he has a party story that rivals our "PTSD- soldier-with-a-knife" party story. I'm pretty sure this is part of some prophecy.
Running my fingers through my hair is like that scene from Patch Adams where the girl goes swimming in a pool of spaghetti. I love molly.
gay sex achievement: unlocked
what
you told me you were going out for groceries!!
I fell asleep giving a handjob, had a sex dream about giving a handjob, and woke up giving a handjob. Life.
Yes but I said "let's get a dog" not a drunk human so some rules will be established this evening
Thought for a game. Duck, Duck, Grey Goose. If you're tapped, you take a shot. Then proceed as normal.
Be there in a sec. We have to stop at Target to buy her underwear first.
Randomize
