I am at the gas station and there is a whole amish family here I'm not sure why the amish need gas but I think its worth investigating
Drinking Grey Goose on the toilet. Don't make me graduate.
Some kid in my class just puked in his backpack, zipped up the backpack, put the backpack on and walked out the door.
He's very warm and cuddly, that's my favorite thing about him. Besides his Porche. And his hot brother.
I just fell off my chair and knocked over the table. People are staring. That hungover.
I'm also 3/4 on the frats. Its like my goal of traveling to all 7 continents, but different somehow and a lot less morally sound.
We had three bowls going. It was a tri-bowl tournament. Harry potter shit.
Topenga is going to be back on TV. Finally my fantasy of her being a milf in junior high has come full circle.
He spelled Steven with "ph", needless to say my nose was almost bleeding from the amount of axe he was wearing.
I need you to be best friend brutally honest about whether or not I can go into public like this.
there’s plenty of nice guys out there with good jobs and NO felonies!
Currently rolling a blunt in the bathroom of Planned Parenthood
There's a weed, money and oreo filled pinata promised for our party.
Okay so my roommate deals some drugs so whenever he leaves we can hook up, be ready
I didn't know I was the on call booty call damn
Last night when we were having sex he put the condom on backwards the first time. While he was putting the second one on I blew up the first one, made it into a balloon and hit him in the head with it. I think we're over the honeymoon stage.
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