halloween costumes for girls are easy, slutty teacher, slutty cop, slutty nurse, etc...
exactly, that's why i want something interesting
slutty neuroscientist?
it was really awkward, he kept trying to get on the bed with us and we kept having to kick him back on the floor.
I only broke up with her because the ex sex is amazing. She will do ANYTHING if i even hint at getting back together
Don't play hard to get, I've seen some of the girls you've slept with.
I assume you will show your seat mates your vibrating cock ring.
The cops walked in to class and arrested 2 guys for possession.
It's amazing how many friends she makes simply by carrying that flask of whiskey everywhere she goes.
There's going to be a pool, lightsabers and alcohol. What could go wrong?!
WRONG DAY TO COME TO CLASS STONED!! WRONG DAY TO COME TO CLASS STONED!! WE'RE WATCHING BIRTHING VIDEOS!!!!
He said i got a new job lets blow this money he bought 4 bottles at the club he is now crying after seeing the reciept
Lol, you asked the waitress to box up someone else's discarded food last night
Just got shoved by an Elvis impersonator. Evidently it isn't cool to ask how much of a disappointment they are in the eyes of their parents.
You okay? Last night you climbed through my window and demanded I take shots with you and when I refused you took a piss in my front yard.
that's your fault. you refused to take shots with me.
He actually said the words 'I miss you' followed by 'I wanna have sex with your face'. I'd say that's a win.
I mean his penis was perfect in pictures but its even more perfect inside me
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