I missed Saved by the Bell this morning, but Ashley in a later episode of Fresh Prince is keeping the morning wood alive.
Yeah I'm pretty sure at one point I was telling her to keep her dick in her pants. She was going to do some serious damage.
Drank beer out of a hotwheels bucket all night
I woke up to 30 angry texts and her Chihuahua in my room. Can you drop him off for me?
knew i was gonna lose at a shoe or be bleeding at some point. and both happened within 20 mins.
Yeah I should probably start planning our first conversation instead of our first child.
No, she isn't nearly as crazy as the girl who wanted to wear a vial of my semen as a necklace.
That chick went from zero to shitshow in only 6 shots.
We fucked so hard that when I orgasmed I tore his towel rack off the wall. He was more impressed than mad.
When he pulled it out last night I asked if that was as hard as it was going to get. I think I may have offended him.
This is stupid. I am not getting knocked up from fucking in his backseat behind a starbucks. I refuse.
I threw up through my nose tonight. Happy cinco de mayo
I think snapchat is trying to tell you something. It's saying your boobs were meant to be seen by his family.
is it acceptable to cross the border for sex?
THERE IS A DOG IN THE CLUB. I repeat a dog in the club. I might have laid down and petted it..I have no shame.
Randomize
