i'm trying to reconcile what i did last night with who i am as a person.
By the end of the second bowl I was making sound effects to every hand movement he made.
is she serious with that outfit? Why doesnt she just paste a for sale sign on her boobs?
A chick at the bar last night took my black berry, looked at my Brick Breaker score and told me she couldnt take someone that has a lower score than her seriously.
On the way home from Florida I threw up at the beginning border and ending border of 6 states. You win this year Spring Break.
Oh shit. Easter I forgot. Maybe we should leave the illegal stuff for when Jesus is less present.
even the AIR tastes like tequila.
Medically speaking as your gynecologist and your girlfriend, that is not a rash.
And we're breaking up
Your biggest crisis right now is that you can't decide whether to keep hooking up with AN NFL PLAYER or try to rekindle your relationship with your ex. You are a walking white girl problem.
You merely adopted the alcohol. I was born into it. Molded by it. I didn't see the hang over until I was a man and by then it was only blinding.
So he just rolled you off his dick and fell on the floor?
I wish drunk me came with subtitles
Do toy wanna orseer frim onedof tjose plaves? Sry textimg with globes on
Gloves*
Out of all the words to correct, you chose gloves??
I am not even ashamed to say it, I got laid in the stairwell of the hotel, by a 29 year old. It was awesome!
Oh no. He's definitely text-flirting with me. No straight man over 30 has any other excuse to use so many smiley faces...
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