she thought the capital of kansas was topanga.
She was crying, alone at a college bar. It would have been rude NOT to try and show my penis to her.
Covered in gravy. Never pour gravy while drinking.
You misunderstood me....i wasnt asking and it is not negotiable
You're making this sound more like a hostage situation than a booty call.
She liked to slap me in the face while she was on top. All I can say is that big boobs can excuse a lot.
I just did a Kegel and my back popped. My vagina is a gift to penises everywhere.
id say I'm a pretty good fuck buddy, i didn't even booty call him on his girlfriends birthday
I don't know man, I have to ask my girlfriend if I can borrow my balls from her purse.
I feel like if you're funneling natty lights on a Wednesday at 2:30pm at the apartment complex pool during finals week, you probably don't have your priorities straight.
Let's go one conversation without mentioning cats or alcohol someday.
Hey, I left a taco in your dishwasher.
You know, finding my first grey pube at 34 is FAR more distressing than finding that first grey hair at 13.
I DO NOT FUCKING WANT OR NEED THIS INFORMATION!
By the time we got to McDonald's you were sharing a Big Mac with a stripper.
I just bought two 8 Balls of Coke from the chick nurse that stitched my leg together in the ER after my bike accident last summer.
Fuck your bullshit loser kid and his gluten allergy.
Randomize
