If I see one more duchette wearing Ed Hardy, but not actually having a real tattoo. I swear Im gonna shank a bitch.
i don't know what the guinness world record is for longest time eating nothing but skittles but i'm going on six days
His little brother walked in on us. Six times.
All I did this weekend was get my life in order. I feel like I wasted my time.
hes the hot one from work who thought i was dead after my party
Every time I roll over in bed I land on a different vibrator. I feel I'm the only one with this problem.
The chlamydia really affected his face.
Poking every semi-decent guy on Facebook in the hopes that one of them will want to hook up with me tonight. So far all i've accomplished is 5 new poke wars which i will most certainly continue after this weekend.
his butt looks cute in my panties so i decided he has to wear panties all the time from now on.
somebody went from crying while watching Full House, to a full on emotional raging bull...I love this time of the month
You don't know how small your school is until you know everyone in the ER on a Friday night.
Do you think if I had a tempurpedic bed he would still be able to feel me fingering myself after we have sex?
There's nothing classy about a pregnant girl at a frat party...remember that.
god i just can't wait for finals to end so i can just masturbate all day and night
I'm with the cops, Trish's gay husband stabbed himself and is framing her for attempt of murder and I'm dressed 4 the club I'm wearing leather pants leather jacket leather boots and black club top. Embarrassed
Randomize
