No see this is how It goes: guys will fuck virgin girls. But girls don't really want to fuck virgin guys. So you're good have no fear.
ironically, his detergent was also "small and mighty"
I'm drinking whiskey outta the bottle trying to earn the trust of some ducks in the yard
Some drunk couple just made out on the sidewalk and it reminded me some sweet moments we have shared...
Ive yelled into your vagina. There are few lines we haven't crossed at this point.
Happy Thanksgiving! Hope its not too awkward that your dad and your boyfriend are the same age.
Just used my front-facing camera to check my pupils. Technology!
Hey! Welcome back! How was the bachelorette in Vegas?
A safari of penis I hurt to the core
Well I was thinking of taking him out for drinks then lecturing him about his drinking... kind of like an open minded intervention
I just sent my ex off to a party, threw a condom at him, and told him to make good choices.
I woke up naked with a $20 bill taped to my titty, so I must of had fun.
At this point it's more of an experiment to see how much actual bush growth is possible. See, being single can be both educational and surprisingly comfy!
I hope I don't have to wait for another triple crown winner to get laid again.
Well as if this year didn't suck enough already, I can now count 2015 as the year I got chlamydia
Sorry, i'm on a strict diet of vodka and regret
Randomize
