I mean roof. it goes up. its important day. you should recongziw it.
You're drunk. Make complete sentences.
It's not luke its my birthday or anything. Mike, understand.
Yep Great. Apparently I didn't just say things once that night. Drink. Yell. Repeat.
U also mentioned u werent wearing any underwear hahahaha
I love how you send me nude pics of girls you're fucking and name them by which city they're in instead of their name. "This is Nashville, this is Tupelo, this is Jackson..."
She said she didn't want to have sex because she was so torn up about "this whole NBC thing."
Who would win... a chainsaw pooping pterodactyl or a bear with machine guns for feet. big debate about this right now
please dont make me drink to the titanic soundtrack
Hospital. He tried giving some kid a stone cold stunner during a real fight.
we spent fifteen minutes trying to convince you that you weren't locked inside of your car
i think i swapped my keys for drugs last night
Hey, remember when Hot Stuff played in the back of the ambulance? Or no, cause of your concussion...
If you quit, you're not going to stick to our game plan of dead by 40. I will not be in the titty bar nursing home without you damning
Damnit.
He woke up & asked where his pants were then asked where he was then asked who I was. Been married 20 yrs. He was drunkest ever.
my gynecologist gave me a high 5 for not getting any STD's since my last visit and said "Way to go Annabeth!" you have twenty seconds to get to my level
So.. I was kinda upset i got the bad fuck out of the situation
I'm currently watching porn and playing beer pong with wine in the lobby of a hotel with a squadron of hot airforce guys. You can never say your life is better than mine again
Randomize
