Cool, I just put that together. I didn't know if using a tie-died sub machinegun was too crazy
I think i peed on brittanys purse
Sarah Palin just quit. Happy Independence day!
God Bless America!
A guy in a big stork costume just came to our meeting to give us condoms and t-shirts telling us not to get pregnant. Only at college
We thought you were crowd-surfing until we realized it was the bouncers throwing you out
Why is there not a 'day after acid' genre. Or even a pandora station or something.
I can't see straight with both eyes and ive only been at the bar for an hour. Someone else typed this for me.
Sry I came all over your dress. Think of it as a Vegas souvenir.
I can't in good conscience help you bag a Catholic girl who isn't at least a 7.
Okay. thanks for sacraficing your body and risking aids for our snowcone business.
Did you see the video of me eating a marshmellow on fire?
If I spent my amateur stripper money does that mean I am cleansed of my sins?
Good night I hope you dream about knitting and threesomes
its 3am and I'm taking a bubble bath, this is what taking a day off work at 30 looks like
I'm sexting at my family's 4th of July BBQ and I feel no shame....
Randomize
