i thought she was just hairy. i didn't know she was also a man.
I just got really nervous and swallowed all of my birth control
I don't think brook has ever known best
You wouldn't stop crying and screaming Hilary Duff doesn't deserve Gossip Girl
vagina is talking i cant
i don't want you to think of me as your TA
Can we please stop calling your vagina the cave of wonders?
he was spitting whole peanuts projectile out of his mouth at the waitresses as they walked by and then yelled across the restaurant that he had "no problem kicking any of their asses"
Show him your tits if he says no
They're not help-me-out-of-jams tits. They're I-fake-people-into-thinking-they-look-good tits.
Found your glasses drenched in ketchup on my driveway this morning
I just laid my head on this pillow and I smelt your penis. It was comforting.
There's a cute bearded guy at this brew fest wearing a kilt and selling mead
TELL HIM ABOUT MY DOWRY!!!
Why is it pressure? I want to see your cute face and possibly sit on it. You make it like its a bad thing.
Just packed vodka and spare underwear into my purse- totally set for watching the hockey with him tonight
All I want is to get shitfaced and fuck random strangers is that really to much to ask?
Randomize
