Last night I had a dream we played Uno and had sex. You won at Uno, but you lost at sex.
is it mean to send ur x his condoms back because they are too small for ur new boyfriend?
It tastes like I coughed up blood....hello liver damage, I've been expecting you.
U shoulda just taken her to a stall and banged her and let me watch the game. Some friend u r.
OK, the bar's closing. Do I go to home to my wife or my girlfriend?
Using his name makes it all too personal. I refuse to get attached to this one. This is all about ass. He doesn't get a name.
i just remember explaining why my socks were better than everyone elses.
Last time I went to flagstaff I threw up in my beard. I would very much like to recreate that moment.
Now in just stoned listening to my dads philosophical idea about public transit
So shaving my butt whilst humming "be prepared" is now in my top five weirdest Friday night activities.
Help. I am eating nachos. But I'm with some guy. I need help. I don't know where I am. The nachos were so good. I'll bring them but help me.
I'm not trying to analyze you I'm just saying you are being unfair to soup
Oh yeah, it was definitely the best sex of my life, I just don't think I can fix the kitchen table before my parents get back...
answer honestly do you think i can make a bloody mary with ketchup????
Is it bad that whip cream tastes like sex to me?
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