fuck you guys, stop putting fake babies in my car the cops came again.
She compares her life to Teen Mom. She's 28.
The meeting is at the same hotel we go to for sex. Avoiding eye contact with all the staff there.
I dont think a "sorry ive slept with most of your teammates" text will do much
i just complicated the hell out of my summer by fucking him this early on
This is going to be another afternoon spent getting drunk in the shower, isn't it?
Apparently I blacked out and pissed all over the sliding glass door from the inside, as everyone watched from the outside helplessly....
Hey.. Here's a thought for the evening. There's only two more sleeps until I fuck you so hard my back teeth will convulse.. Here's too Tuesday! Woohooooo
Bitch, I been tryna reach you all day to talk to you about these Dorito tacos.
Well for starters, her tits were hairy.
he told me while inside me and mid thrust that he's dreamed of that moment since high school... awkward
I think I have to break up with him. I just cried, not moaned, screamed, etc, cried, with tears of sadness and disappointment when I came.
I didn't wake up drunk this year...I must be getting soft
Yeah I guess quad-fisting Miller Lites just isn't as effective as it used to be
It's been two whole weeks and I haven't missed a single class. I deserve 69 blunts.
We were making out on the floor and his 13 year old beagle crawled in between us & just sat there...I got cockblocked by an ancient beagle named Bubba
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