Running into every girl no one would hook up with here at rick's. Typical.
You should have seen k-money last night. She was just hanging on to the toilet for half the night. By her fourth trip to puke, she started talking to it and was doing the voices for her and it. She kept saying "...we thank you for your continued business..." haha
it was almost as awkward as hearing my parents on friday nights in 2 in the morning starting, and than hearing at 2:01 my dad getting up and my mom going "i should have married a man"
I hate myself for saying your mom and I have the same friday nights.
don't worry... so do I
I wish there was a Glade Plug-in for vaginas
well..after leaving the bar you handed me your wallet and said you didnt need it cause you were going to find the cash cab and added 'i'll see you on tv'
Thank you as well. My penis is starting a slow-clap right now.
The bouncer yelled at him for poking at the guy selling roses, I think it's time to leave.
I'm naked and wearing a cowbell.i love med school.
Strip mythology. Everyone wins. Most of all me.
Girl it's 3:30 get your life together and come enjoy a bowl, some coffee and a brownie with me
"You can go raw dog up in me". Exact words. I can't decide whether to run, or fuck. Help.
It sucks laughing and vomiting at the same time, trust me. I kind of remember
He asked me how france is treating me
Tell him you got so much dick you may never come back to the US. That ought to keep him away
Okay, tomorrow we'll have a day of life-sorting and plasma-selling.
just saw the most amazing side boob. i wanted to hold it.
Randomize
