I love how girls just decide that guys who don't like them must be gay
I do the same thing. If a girl doesn't like me...I am like, "i must be gay"
70 feet underwater and I sharted my wetsuit, Tide pen won't clean this up.
oral is when you put your mouth on someones privates and play moterboat or popsicle
Reason #437 to hate Louisiana: Just went to the public bathroom at work. It was so humid the toilet seat was damp and sticky. Either it's the humidity or I sat in somebody's yesterday piss. I choose to believe the humidity.
We made a drinking game out of Project Runway. Gay guys are so fun.
How did the whale quest end up? I saw u hit a little snag when the first one heard you call her that.
He paid me $20 to swallow a baggie of glitter, which turned out to be the best decision I've ever made. My vomit has never been prettier.
He looks like a fat version of lurch from the adams family and smells like fritos. This is not the caliber man I want pleasuring himself to the thought of me!
S.O.S. he's talking about horses and breast feeding.
I was going to say I needed the exercise but now all I can think about is BJs
My work here is done
Donald Trump and I would be so adorably orange together!
My friends son got stung by a jellyfish over the weekend and we seriously stood there debating on whether or not we should pee on this toddler.
I want you to get off the plane and get directly into my pants
I still can't believe that dog licked my nipple.
EW HE LOOKS LIKE SOMEONE'S DAD
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