He's telling me stories about how he made out with a 14 yr old when he was 22. I'm going home.
the not having weed thing wouldnt be nearly as tragic if it wasnt the one holiday where they launch bright flaming things into the air
ur penis kinda felt like a vagina to me
his mom and I have the same butterfly tramp stamp. don't ask how that came up
I'll pull you in a wagon. You'll have a sash and a crown on and we'll sing "All the Single Ladies"
And I was slip and sliding my life away on a giant tarp with tons of soap and bitches. Priorities man, priorities.
TINY HANDS NOT FOR BUTTHOLES
This is going everywhere on the internet.
I wiped my mouth this morning with a pine tree branch after I threw up on the side of the road. Tis the season
Who was the person who brought the rooster when they won @ beer pong
QUIT RUINING DICK PICTURE DAY
They sleep with other people as long as there is no oral. Logic and reason were thrown out the window a long time ago with them.
i would compare it to sliding down a velcro-covered fireman's pole naked. no more bearded men for me.
Would it be sad if I made a blanket fort to get drunk in till the power came back?
I ripped off the screen and literally supermaned through my bedroom window. That wasted
I'm high. I apologize for that last sentence
Randomize
