O no, u 2 are dating again?
No. I just masturbate furiously to his picture
apparently when i got back to tyler's i layed face down on the bed and yelled "don't hurt my asshole!"
I wish you could see the look on my boss's face right now.
wtf?
Before you passed out in the middle of the NHL 10 party you had to prove that you were a better fighter than Patrick Kane. Your not. Thanks for the black eye dipshit.
Oh. Im drinking alone in a banana costume. Every time youre feeling down, i want you to think of me right now and know that your life is better than mine.
Yep we found him face down in my sister's bathroom begging for blowjobs without mustard
Good news: he out-ran the campus police. Bad news: they were chasing him toward the REAL police.
Theres a 75% chance I'm wearing a hocky mask and nothing else right now
Ps I am
You take a step back sometimes and are like "when was the last time I was sober?" or "wow I need to stop putting everything in my vagina"
Is this an intervention?
Cleaning my pipe and using the left over resin solution to make THC laced rolling papers and a jar of hash oil/honey for my tea
WE USE THE WHOLE BUFFALO
Sorry I punched you in the throat. You got in my way. You understand.
I know we were going to go hiking today, but I don’t think I can face reality until Wednesday
I'm trying to be celibate. I'm having me time. I'm eating cake.
The first thing you did was give us a tour of the house and showed us who was "on-limits" and "off-limits"
He woke up from being passed out on the couch mumbled something that sounded like "Taco" then proceeded to the bathroom only to pass out again, I think we need to learn how to party like him!
after we fucked i left the room and when i came back he was patting his dick whispering "prouda you lil guy...prouda you"
Randomize
