Short Circuit remake moving forward, David Carradine dead by his own hand. Come home soon, society deteriorating rapidly. Nation's capitol likely not safe.
i just wish he would text me so i could ignore his text and show him how little i care anymore
it's not cheating when I paid for it
Yes, she did suck your dick in the bathroom to wake you up.
I have six drafts of messages to you that just say "blood" and I have no idea where they came from.
Just drove past the dude that came in your sock
Alright we have to be drunk.before noon tomorrow. Its a new law i just got passed through congress. It goes into effect imediately
i should probably stop thinking with my vagina, and start using that $70, 000 education i can't afford. what the fuck.
Even when you're down just know that I will always be the one to pour alcohol into your asshole when you're on probation
What? My family got wasted on patron and I threw up on my pants and said it was gravy. Hot mess.
sorry for laughing and taking pictures while you were having an asthma attack on st. patricks day
Woke up in a cemetery. Puked in front a funeral ceremony that was going on.
I'm just gonna back away slowly and come back when there's less weird crap.
My hook-up from last week somehow found me at the club, saw the girl I was trying to fuck, kissed me right in front of her, and walked off.
I woke up this morning and my house is covered in shredded cheese with my laptop open and a google image search for "awesome shit".
Randomize
