you might want to delete the history when you're done using the computer at work. did you ever find out what the white balls in your throat were?
WHY DOES GOD HATE MY DICK
I think you came in my ear last night and I had to pick it out infront of my kids in class today
its not facebook stalking, its market reasearch
college "breaks" should be renamed "reminder why you left your hell hole of a life in the first place"
I cannot believe we're comparing my vagina to Mary Poppins and a black hole.
i found him! he's on the front porch using a bag of potting soil as a pillow. i forgot i left him there.
he's my ex-boyfriend's best friend... he tried to make out with me to prevent me from hitting his friend. then they almost fought about it.
teach me your ways.
Two dudes. Loud music. Dancing shirtless possibly naked. Why would I ever need cable?!
Is it bad that all my wine bottles have teeth marks in the cork?
hand jobs are a waste of time that only lead to arm cramps. Also, where do you look...his eyes, at the penis, at the tv?
yeah the "where to look" question is super awkward
so the kid in line in front of me at walmart just bought roses and a Plan B pill. Happy Valentines Day.
Well, I currently have zero fuckboys and my vibrator just broke. A fresh start to May.
I made out with a guy dressed as the pdx airport carpet.
Portlandia didn't prepare you for that?
Can I come over and use your shower? My roommate got drunk last night and took my bathroom door off its hinges
Randomize
