You passed out in the bathroom with the door locked. Had to take a shit in your litter box. Don't worry, your cat buried it for me.
Maybe I need a light up heart over my vagina like Christina aguilera to get the point across
Lesbians. Lesbians everywhere.
i am one more weekend without sex away from dosing him with viagra and locking ourselves into a closet.
He asked me out while I'm back in town. I have to acknowledge and honor his persistence.
Your vagina must be laced with cocaine...
Random question, but did I leave a spoon on your dresser last night?
i sucked his cock and got snuggles in return. I'm the mother Theresa of giving in a relationship.
She keeps asking if I've seen him... For the last time YES... IN MY BED LAST FRIDAY NIGHT AND THEN AGAIN SATURDAY MORNING
Today's been pretty great, I went and bought the new Batman for the sole purpose of masturbating to Bane
This is the most boring acid ever. I feel like a child. But thats okay, I've been a child before, its nothing new.
I need an adult. someone more adult than my current state
He was hammered and shot his pistol into the lawn. Next thing I know sheriffs are at our house with M4s. He likes to party
YOU BETTER TOUCH MY NIPPLES TODAY
I feel like I put a fire out with my hand but idk if that was a dream or not
she crossed my comfort zone...i thought i was a freak
said the guy with a pink sex swing...
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