i cant believe u jumped in someones trunk just to get out of talking to me
To think... Somewhere, too drunk by buckcherry is someone's theme song
I got a 69.7 in accounting. I have this whole doing the bare minimum down to a science
im contemplating emailing my dad and telling him how worthless i am and how sorry i am that he pays for my life...aka my bar tabs.
Just tried to fight the dj at cowboys because he would'nt play freebird. Pick me up now.
Just bonged a beer from a vuvuzela...this place is only doing good for me
apparently we spent 30 minutes inside that big Nike store turning all of their Duke gear inside out. for some reason the employees didn't stop us.
It was weird. Like "Mom, Dad, here's a guy who knows my orgasm face".
Are you still crying. What are you doing. Have 10 shots of tequila.
Ugh. I guess I'm crying loudly or something. My mom just came in and gave me milk, chocolate, a Xanax, and her weed "for the break up blues". Her ways of affection are so odd.
Just had sex in the darkroom, while a class was going on ten feet away. I finally have a good sex story.
You screamed "i promise ill stop blowing your brother" in the middle of a packed restaurant at 1pm. We should maybe rethink our relationship.
you never keep up with shots anymore
I'm trying to be more responsible these days
you fucking tried to take your pants off and pee in Taco Bell's parking lot
You tore a poster off a lamppost and ATE IT. That drunk.
Let me call you later. I’m lining up some office dick now that working at home is ending
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