carls jr on main st. japanese tourist taking a dump in the urinal. reading a japanese newspaper and wearing a full suit.
be there in 3 mins
WHO ATE OUR COOKIES WHAT THE FUCK THOSE WERE GOURMET
so while we were having sex, he stuck it in my but, and when he finished he goes next time can we have anal. i don't know if that means im tight or my butt hole is loose, i choose to think the first one
so apparently telling her she could shit easier and therefore lose weight faster wasn't the best arguement for getting anal.
Just sold a bike on craig's list for 4 four lokos and a 40. How bad do you miss college?
My dream of liquor pitchers came true
Sorry I sent so many blank messages. My hands are slippery. Don't ask why.
you can't tell me it's over and send me pics of you and your cat?
Idk. It's not appealing to me. Like don't get me wrong, I love ur dick A LOT but I don't want to stare at it on an iPhone screen
idk wtf was in that bud but I was talking to my dead dog last night bro holy shit
I did this clutch move yesterday at the bar where I grabbed a plastic cup for water and discreetly threw up in it while walking around and then tossed it. It was my best boot and rally ever
This drunk girl kept yelling for water so I dipped a cup in the toilet and gave it to her. She was thanking me all night.
And you hate the library
Yea but I love drugs and my grades
Next time you decide to post pictures of yourself in your underwear on facebook, please don't tag me as your bulge.. My mom spent 10 minutes looking for me in that picture. I had to tell her I was hiding.
fyi: first time in five days i havent washed my birth control down with liquor. when are we going out tonight?
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