I would blow Magic Johnson for a pack of lucky strikes right now. Post-hiv.
he chased her out of the bar yelling "TAKE MY VIRGINITY" and i havent seen her since
My dick has been asking about u. He said he didn't do anything wrong n I'm a dumbass
And then he said "my dick isn't hard enough and your tits aren't big enough for this to work"
Stop trying to talk to my friends!!
then get some ugly ones...
I just want you to know that were having pizza delivered to the emergency room
There is so much to learn about oneself from autofill.
The dry cleaners wouldn't even take our clothes. That's how bad of a night it was.
i took my sailor hat off and used it as a vom bucket
She bellyflopped onto the poolside bar, broke one wine bottle, and stole another...the resort staff just frowned and cleaned up her mess.
My only regret is that we didn't pee on our neighbors Prius
Ya I guess if we compared our actions now with our actions 2 years ago. We are definitely in a constant state of shit showness.
I panicked i brought burritos. Funeral burritos
I think my pussy is going to freeze to the ground
Best part though was when he wanted to cuddle and I was like, I'm going to go.
Randomize
