Will you still be my friend if I read and enjoyed Twilight?
No
I wont touch it. I promise i wont touch it. JUST GET UNDER THE DAMN TABLE PLEASE.
it was average length and chubby
so kinda like him?
now i'm wondering if all guys are shaped like their penis...
You pointed at his crotch then made a thrusting motion. I think it's safe to say every guy at my college loves you.
just credit carded her and her mom at the same time... that drunk. get on my level
Somehow I don't trust you in this state to talk to you about a colonoscopy
The guy I wanted to make out with just got beat up, let's roll.
He has to watch his girlfriends kitten. Even when she is in Vegas, her pussy keeps him from getting into mine.
I woke up in the ER. This living like theres no tomorrow really could mean theres no tomorrow.
She wouldn't put out on the first date. I think my boner put a hole in my mattress.
This conversation has now reached a level of awkward that even a passerby streaking hobo couldn't break.
Nothing like coaching 5 year olds with a bunch of visible bruises from last night's drunk bondage sex.
He was trying to break into my apartment to get the coke he left last night, didn't engage parking break, so the van started rolling. yup, it's broken.
He sent me off with a naked dance ending in a meat swing. I don't think I'll be seeing him again.
Sorry, i'm on a strict diet of vodka and regret
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