He's married, a coworker, and a smoker. not sure which personal rule broken i'm most ashamed of...
I am a terrible person. This is almost as bad as when I was going to see my ex while my boyfriend was at that funeral.
My mom and I are having a "yay I don't have herpes" shopping trip day
Hey, hey, hey, hey. This is a hurriCAN.
that's probably because you left your arm in the fishtank for 90% of the night
Awkward moment: seeing and saying hey to the MILF you're sleeping with while shopping with your mother and sister.
Dude, double fisting packs of Ramen saved my life last night
If you want it you better put a ring on it. And by ring I mean one of my three favorite pies.
Well shit, I would've slept with him if I knew he was gonna be in the draft.
Her ex was at the party her housemates were having. He knocked on her door asking how she was while we were going at it. Turns out they were trying to work things out. Don't think I'll ever forget his face when we walked out of her room.
I may or may not have tried to give myself a lobotomy
whatever. i don't need to be drunk to tell you i'd suck your dick if you had one.
Is using La Croix as a mixer for vodka a legit way to reach my daily water consumption?
he literally walked in took a shit and left ringing the 'great service' bell on the way out.
she said she was so hungover this morning in a way that sounded like she was apologizing for thinking she was attracted to me last night...
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