went in for an STD check and they referred me to an alcohol and drug councilor. kick me when i'm down.
I've officially put my junk in foods from 5 of the 6 layers of the nutrition pyramid
she's got that wholesome 16 and pregnant look.
he used his one phone call on me and it said "you have a collect call from- LETS GET IT- at the montgomery county jail".
Her gay brother kept hitting on me and cockblocking me. Don't even begin to tell me how bad your night was.
The fairy wings and cowboy hats were not the issue. The bag of cocaine that I held in the air as we drove in the parade might have been.
Well, he has like 3 girlfriends but I think I could be polygamist for that dick.
you got me arrested i just think that goes without question you owe me a blowjob
I keep calling his kid the wring name. This is not helping my cause. And by cause mean his dick
I'm that hungover student in class ... On a wednesday morning
Omg I think I'm in the wrong class
hotdog in my bra and i still managed to score. Got a bit freaked when he tried to eat it though. I paid 3 bucks for that fucking hotdog.
When you get here, kick me in the balls. It's really important. - I'll explain later.
And by defning the relationship I mean telling him I'm gonna fuck other people but its cool If he does the same.
Yeah sorry about that. I got pulled into the Russian student society's end of term party. There was too much vodka and eurodance to come help you pack.
Did we pole dance in front of my boss last night or was it just me?
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