There is a girl getting fingered on my left, a middle aged drink man smoking a bong and two girls flashing the cameras in front of me. I'm in the middle trying to maintain my innocence.
We put her face under a blacklight.....it looked like fireworks
This unplanned pregnancy thing is really taking all the fun out of football season.
The only thing that would make my night better is if William Shatner came and read me a bedtime story.
I'm not a pervert.. I just like to be naked...
And for your info. Don't pee outside with glow sticks. People will still see you.
It was worse than when we pepper-sprayed my dick. I feel mislead.
Sorry about giving you those ripped gym shorts after my dog ate your pants, but after the awkard BJ incident I didn't plan on hearing from you again
Yea he called the cop officer fonzarelli and asked him if he was mad because happy days was off the air. Boom, beaten and arrested
Just peed in the fountain while its snowing. Fell flat on my ass, literally my butt naked ass in a pile of snow. It's safe to say I'm done with drinking on weekdays
How do you explain to a guy that he's like a little puppy dog that you play with, but then leave at the shelter to go home to your German Shepard?
We're living together and you don't know if I've seen Titanic?!
I just remembered that we had an in-depth conversation about how it was too stressful to wear pants.
Never has jello made me angry to the point of drinking. But here I am.
Ok. Yes. He has a tiny penis. But he also has a trust fund.
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