She's NOT homeless...she graduated early.
Im at a party and this guy hitting on me just showed me his 'caution choking hazard' tattoo right above his penis. There goes any chance he had of getting laid tonight.
she keeps a pillow, blanket, and a pack of saltines under the bathroom sink, for "rough nights".
I hope the doctor doesnt lift up and my shirt and listen to my lungs. I dont want to explain why I have rug burns on my back.
Looks like a significant portion of my drinking money just became legal fees.
That place is a DUI and an STD waiting to happen. I think I'll pass.
Told some guy to hold your weave while you "tried" to kick his girlfriends ass...
woke up with empty beer can still duct taped into my fists and the word "dove" written on the back of my neck
I'm up in my room and I just saw a naked guy sprint out into the streets from my mom's party downstairs
I woke up with your vibrator in my face
Haven't sucked a dick since mid December. In crisis mode.
He fed me Girl Scout cookies while I was still tied up...what did I do right?
after we fucked i left the room and when i came back he was patting his dick whispering "prouda you lil guy...prouda you"
I had to ask my mom to look for my kegle ball...
Talk all the shit you want but I slept in a oversized monster truck tire last night.
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