Worst sexual experience IN MY LIFE. And now i know why it makes jesus cry.
Nothing says "This dudes gotta go" better than a boner on your back waking you @ 5 in the morning
Of course it's dangerous. Why else would they hire us after we failed the drug test?
Tried to steal a keytar from my hook up's house.
She's the drunk girl with the air-horn and sunflower seeds.
Btw...I puked in my hand last night and threw it on the floor. Don't let me do tequila ever again.
Mystery solved. Def had ice creme last night. There is a melted half eaten ice creme bar next to the bed. Which had melted onto my pillow. That explains why it was in my hair too. Im a fucking sherlock holmes over here.
Do you know of any good hiding spots in the Atlanta area?
Well there is another shower in Nov. So I have three months to figure out how to get some drunk space fucking. May need some of your mead
Yea no bueno and I only brought enough weed to last one night. And it was no Hanukah nug, it didn't last 8 days.
I'm not sure we can use safewords tho. She smokes so much she had to keep asking what the safewords was. Bondage and bongs don't mix
Do you know how much wine is in a box of wine? Not so much an amount, but whether it will kill me if I drink the entire box this xmas
dude, where did you go? french fries taste like numbers
If I'm not naked in the back of a cop car having sex by the end of the night, I did something wrong..
But you''re still having sex with him. And a hobo convinced you to.
Randomize
