The night ended with a lot of tears and everyone singing along to Willenium
How can people commit suicide when things like bagels exist
it's official, i know exactly what cross streets we're at by the bumps when i give him road head
Definitely contact high. Thirty miles an hour listening too i can see clearly now wanting too eat the steering wheel
Im having a christmas reunion party tonight. Last year i ate my own contact. We'll see how this year goes
I had so much drainage I couldn't moan properly. Fuck allergy season
What would you say is the recommended tip for a hotel maid who has to clean up vomit on just about every surface of a hotel bathroom?
How much booze could a drunk brad chug when a drunk brad does chug booze?!?
All. The answer is always all
She just asked to come over. She's either going to bring one of her dads guns and kill me or we're going to end up having insane lesbian sex.
Dude, half of south Mississippi has seen my taint. I'm not worried.
Shower wine is way better than shower beer.
That's MADAM THUNDERCUNT to you
I'm recovering from the blowjob...She's doing her taxes...
I'm a mess. I mean I almost got off but I'm a fucking rubics cube down there so il givenhim the point
We had sex in Lake Michigan for an hour Sunday.
Thanks for ruining an entire lake for me. I hate you so much right now.
Randomize
