Moved my bed either I'm a whore or every guy I have ever slept with hid condom wrappers under my bed
I hope God doesn't listen to everybody on a Saturday night.
Until he has ordered mozzarella sticks & beers at 2pm while wearing formal attire, then this is still my bar.
so i woke up.. still drunk and discovered my roommate in the living room passed out dick-in-hand watching porn..
What did u do?
turned the porn up and opened the windows so everybody goin to class could see him..
the fact that you could barely do more than slur incoherent sentences didn't stop you from correcting her grammar
My stomach is revolting cause i have put food in it and no alcohol.
Just took a shot of tequila with a random guy at the supermarket. Happy cinco de fourth.
Eh maybe I should give her a chance. Let's see where making a porno takes the friendship
Just make it a game! Like 20 questions STD style.
Also, just woke up in a Romney tank and sequin flag panties. Merica.
my goal for the rest of college is to escape STD free. fuck getting a job. this is more important.
Girl I'm contemplating picking up some adult diapers. That's how bad this is and it's only day 2.
help. there is a guy in a bunny costume.
answer honestly do you think i can make a bloody mary with ketchup????
I should not have moved in with him. He's got porn stashed everywhere like a homosexual squirrel.
You love porn!
Not in the sugar bowl when I'm making my Mom coffee I don't.
Randomize
