dude i woke up laying next to some guy. i dont have my bra or his name. he has a nice tv though.
Why can't we have signs that automatically flash on our foreheads that say not interested when gross ugly guys come around, like those glasses that get dark when the sun comes out?
never try to heat up a hot pocket in the dryer if ur microwave breaks...bad idea.
I learned his name tonight. This now makes him a real person. Obviously, I no longer want to sleep with him.
I love how kegs are figured into our monthly bills
Ok just don't go to jail. I saw your account balance. It can't take that.
I can now tell my grandchildren Central Park has really great spots for quickies...
besides i was ending his dry spell. it's written in the bible that jesus likes that right?
Yes stubble LOOKS hot but factor in his shitty bj skills and I might as well have jacked off with apricot scrub
I'm two sheets to the sexual wind
Wake your ass up this is a day of horror where we get horroibly drunk and sleep with tandom dudes who wish they were super heros ps i havr stuffed animals over my privates im a petting zoo this year
I only see on penis in this picture but I assume there is another lurking out of sight.
Personally, if my roommate had a nice friend who made me dinner, gave me free beer, a 4am meal, a couch to sleep on in an apartment on the beach, and breakfast when I woke up, and I found out that said roommate was fucking her, I'd be all... right on! She's cool! Thanks for the quesadillas!
I was at his place until 2am. We just sat really close an stared at each other. I think you are right. Germans must not have feelings. Not even tingly ones in their pants.
you can't just call dibs on my vagina bro.
Randomize