I think we should make Neil Patrick Harris a permanent part of our role playing.
entire chemistry final was about beer... i actually might miss this place
Trust me. My penis has made more than enough decisions this weekend.
A three fingered guy just showed up with fireworks and bourbon, tonight will be entertaining.
It was like something out of a fucked up fairy tale. He just crowdsurfed over to her while riding a keg, said "come sail with me", and then the crowd carried them off into the night. What.
Bro i pulled the fucking willy wonkas gold ticket of ratchets the other night this chick was a real treat god bless her
He's still short.... And probably a douchebag. But if we ever run into him downtown I fully encourage you to take him home and have "I hate you douchebag" sex and lick every inch of that disgustingly toned chest.
The only thing left on my Bucket List is getting fingered at an aquarium.
I just remember yelling "BODY SHOTS BODY SHOTS BODY SHOTS" while I was streaking
You should never be more than a quarter of a mile from a working toilet
Preach!
I am literally this close to screaming out my window if anyone nearby was down to fuck. I am too damn horny.
im about to bake her parents a "thank you for making such beautiful babies, ive had sex with all 5 of them" cake
He texted me at 4:30 in the morning saying "I'm not drunk but I think you're beautiful" and then a facebook message at 6 am saying "hi" and the subject was "oh"
you yelled, puked and cried then passed out in the fetal position in your underwear
2020 sucks, I want a refund
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