the red head has a bf
just because there's a goalie doesn't mean u can't score
...so i touched it.
I think im going to throw up on grandma
When I was her age, Pluto was still a planet... but i said what the hell
I woke up this morning and was hoping we drank enough last night to have a unicorn drawn on my wrist. Good News: We did.
we need blinds so i can safely watch porn during the day
dear roomies, would anyone wanna donate the booze they left in the fridge over break to the "your roomies snowed in and all alone" fund?
I taped Calvin and Kyles heads together face to face while they were passed out. You should have seen them stumbling around using hungover teamwork trying to find scissors.
yeah except there is a correlation between drinking moonshine and going blind, which kind of concerns me
there are some nice people on this island. free ride free pancakes and they even prayed for us when they dropped us off
It'll be a Christmas-Fucking-Miracle if we get through the ceremony without a groomsman vomming
I'm so pissed my boobs hit the emergency stop button during my workout
I have a scary feeling my mom might switch her goals from finding me a husband in 2012 to sending me to rehab
a 6'8" white kid in a Lin jersey just wandered out of my gay kid brother's room. when does spring break end, again?
There were a lot of gay moments in between the Strippers and coke
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